If you stake your hopes for a breakthrough on trying harder than ever, you may kill your chances for success.
I know you haven’t heard from me in a couple of weeks. That’s because I almost gave up and closed my business. Truthfully, it wasn’t going to be a permanent closure as I hoped to resume business in the Fall.
How did I reach this point? Well, I’m having a baby!
I’m currently 5 months pregnant and this pregnancy has taken quite a toll as I continue to battle severe morning symptoms into this trimester. While this experience may be unique, you too may be dealing with overwhelming circumstances that make you ask yourself, is this worth it?
As a mother, entrepreneur, and partner (friend, cousin, sister, etc), I understand how it feels when it all becomes too much. I’m constantly asked by women in our community with or without children, working full-time and building a business, how do I achieve balance. One client recently told me I appear to have a “beautiful balance” of it all.
Here’s the truth: It’s hard. I cry. I scream. I lean on my friends. I attend therapy and receive coaching. I’m exhausted. And I constantly ask myself, “how can I continue to do it all?”
I even think about returning to traditional work where it might be easier to manage these many facets of life.
You see, we are in complete control of our lives and can create whatever reality we desire.
Last week, I was ready to close shop because I felt I couldn’t uphold a standard. My business mentor suggested working 20 hours a week on one’s business. I couldn’t maintain even 10-15 hours of work.
Also, I have a standard or have defined my identity as a woman who can operate at a full-time work capacity, volunteer for multiple organizations while holding leadership positions in each one, keep my house clean, play with my kid in the evening and have sex with my man before bedtime..Yeah, I said it!
Guess what? NONE of the above was happening. Honestly, it hasn’t happened for a sustainable amount of time in the past year or so. Consequently, I felt like a failure.
I know I’m not a failure, but the feeling was there. I felt as if my body was rebelling against me and not following my pregnancy plan (laughable, I know). Although my clients got what they needed, I felt they weren’t being served to the standard that I desired. Most importantly, I was struggling to take care of myself. That’s when I fully knew something had to give.
I had to get REAL with myself on multiple fronts.
Can you relate? Have you ever gotten to this place of total defeat and decided something has to go?
Often the first thing we give up is tending to ourselves. I didn’t want to do that. So, I decided I would table my business so I could focus on the needs of my high risk pregnancy, my family and my general well-being. But I couldn’t shake this feeling that this wasn’t the best decision for me.
I realized LIVING out my purpose tends to my spirit. It tends to the deepest part of me, my Godself. She wants to create, heal, and thrive.
While my original decision was one made from love, I was shrinking from the task at hand- what I am called to do.
What is your spirit asking of you?
Along with this realization, my business coach reminded me, “Life can be easy.” She instructed, “Release the resistance.”
Do you believe life can be easy? If you’re anything like me, all we’ve known is struggle. While I believed life can be easy for others, I didn’t believe it could for me. That was a problem.
What exactly is resistance? Resistance can be fear. It can be dissatisfaction with “what is.” Resistance can present itself through you comparing your journey to another’s walk.
As I released resistance, I accepted my current circumstances- “what is.” Following that, the question became, now what?
If I wanted to release dissatisfaction and be content with my life, closing my business was not the answer.
My answer revealed itself in my understanding that we are creators.
I am not my former self and I am not my mentor (who doesn’t have children) who works a minimum of 20 hours of week on her business.
You see, we can create whatever life we desire.
I’m committed to doing just that- creating a business that fits around my lifestyle demands. A life where I no longer live in reference to antiquated standards I created long ago.
If it’s not crafted around your today, then it may no longer serve your current needs.
Ask yourself: Who do you need to be to get where you want to go?
I share all this to say to you, let go of what’s not serving you, but don’t give up on your purpose!
There are endless possibilities to creating the life, career, and business you desire.
Life does’t have to be hard.
What’s required is for you to adjust to “what is” and claim your power to choose. Own your destiny & walk confidently in the choices you make for your life.
If you are ready to fully walk in your purpose and honor your calling, I invite you to explore if and how we can work together. I have 2 slots available for sistas who are ready to fully harness their inner Black Woman CEO and take their business to new heights…but who know they just need support, accountability and a system to get out of their own way.
If you are stuck and frustrated with your business,
If you dream of living your legacy right now,
Then apply for a Confident CEO Strategy Session so we can explore if and how I can help you.